Not in Water

but I cannot swim
not in water
not in anything viscous
slime
oil
blood
so all this spluttering, drowning, almost dying
rescued by the iron grasp of my own fears
leaves possibility always stranded a wet impossibility away
consider the absurd discontent of flailing and kicking
when I can teach myself to walk
jettisoning the weight of all desire
the dead weight of one desire
sure footed as air
but what purpose would that crossing serve
when I can go down breathless
a magnificent shipwreck of passion
blood
oil
slime
but what purpose would that sinking serve
IΒ cannot swim
not in water

Advertisements

34 thoughts on “Not in Water

  1. I like the circularity of this poem – a bit like swimming round a pool – and I also very much like the awkward, struggling feeling, which makes me squirm, in the lines:
    ‘so all this spluttering, drowning, almost dying
    rescued by the iron grasp of my own fears
    leaves possibility always stranded a wet impossibility away’
    and the imagery in the lines:
    ‘… I can go down breathless
    a magnificent shipwreck of passion’.

    Like

  2. This brought back memories of the event that caused me to be terrified of water for 40+ years. I almost drowned “learning” to tread water in the 7 foot end of a pool. Sunk to the bottom and someone had to pull me out. So glad I’ve overcome that fear and was therefore not terrified by this poem.

    Like

  3. I love these sections:

    “not in anything viscous
    slime
    oil
    blood”

    “leaves possibility always stranded a wet impossibility away”

    “but what purpose would that crossing serve
    when I can go down breathless”

    Like

  4. “rescued by the iron grasp of my own fears”

    This line really grabbed my attention. All I could think was that your fear of a fantasy failing was what kept you from drowning in desire? I’m unsure but I enjoyed this!

    Like

  5. A beautiful write Rajani and it has a meditative feel to it too. I don’t know if you are familiar with Pema Chodron’s meditations where you dive deep inside your fear, right into to the centre to see that there is nothing to fear at all, that right in that centre you feel the warmth of love.

    Like

  6. I love your ‘shipwreck of passion’, Rajani. What a powerful poem. I can feel myself falling, struggling under the pressure, drowning. Great write, my friend πŸ™‚

    Like

  7. You deftly describe how it might actually be to drown; however I myself prefer to not dwell on it too much as it frightens me more than any other means of death.. and I don’t think I would be strong enough to live through the tumultuous few moments it takes to read your creative poem.

    Like

Please leave a Thot...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s