Indolent tongues of yellow light, peering from tired clay lamps, flicked the smooth curtain of darkness, feeling its inky texture, curious, wanting to burn a little hole in its opaque folds to unravel the mangled debris of thirty six years, that she had carefully concealed behind it.
While the fireworks floated down from the sky into her kohl tipped eyes, while the ghee from the gold flecked sweets glistened on her open lips, while the rustle of her Benaras silk fanned the shimmering dance of the seductive Diwali night, she smiled.
The truth could wait till morning.
alone on the grass
in the grey dawn rain
the crow doesn’t know it is crying
Good, descriptive language.
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Thank you 🙂
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I feel truth in the image of not knowing one is crying.
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Thanks Victoria..
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Highlight fairs around
the world sing
stars of joy
in human
heart.. as humans
are made to live
together and
it is the
separate
that can
be lonely
and truly insane..
at least an online
connection can
bRinG dreams
of real
human
civilization
again together
free and sane..:)
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Phenomenal writing!!!
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Thank you…
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Just because we most often wish to be in the light, doesn’t mean our wishes will be honored. I like the very real contrast and the awareness that light wouldn’t be light without the darkness to define it. Really like your poem,
Elizabeth
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Thanks Elizabeth, appreciate your response…light does need the darkness to define it!
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This is a wonderfully rendered haibun … exquisitely drawn images, cascading though layered prose and moving haiku.
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Thanks so much Wendy.
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Diwali ~ such a beautiful festival of lights. This piece is so atmospheric and poignant.
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Thanks Loredana
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Loneliness and sadness personified. Wow, Thot!
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Thank you Totomai !
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“the crow doesn’t know it is crying” perhaps hints of her state of mind in relation to to her hidden past and the impending revelation of truth? Beauifully worded.
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Thank you.. absolutely right, was trying to mirror both their emotions!
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Wow! Amazing
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Thanks Purba.
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This is an intriguing poem, and it reaches a whole new level with the haiku, and the crow that doesnt know it is crying. Wowzers! I loved this!
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Thanks so much Sherry, glad it worked!
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I hope you had a most celebratory Diwali. This is an exquisite description. I really like the juxtaposition of the final haiku.
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Thank you Kerry 🙂
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Wishing you a very Happy Diwali 😀 such an exquisite write 😀
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Thanks so much Sanaa 🙂
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i sense a mystery here. what truth will unfold in the morning? does the answer lies in the haiku? 🙂
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The truth hidden away so deep that one is no longer aware of it..or pretends not to be.
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Beautiful writing, Rajani, and I thought the haibun went splendidly with your prose. You had me thinking about the crow crying in the rain, who didn’t know it was crying. I was feeling the way suffering and discomfort in our lives can worm their way into our souls and become a strange normalcy, like the way a pungent scent on the farm is obvious to people just arriving from the city… but the farmer is oblivious… The familiar so often keeps the truth hidden from us…
Peace
Michael
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Absolutely Michael, you’ve explained it so well. I wonder if we truly adapt to pain by sheer instinct to survive or our denial mechanism is so finely honed, we would ratther never face up to it.
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What a beautiful description as it flows from the festival of lights…from darkness to light…celebration to a releasing of the sorrow.
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I like the contrast of the darkness with the light. I like the way your haibun expresses a facet of Diwali!
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Thank you..
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luv the easy rhythm of beauty light and festivity in your haibun
Have a blessed Sunday Thothpurge
much love…
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Thanks Gillena
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This is a most amazing image: “curtain of darkness, feeling its inky texture, curious, wanting to burn a little hole in its opaque folds” Such is flame in dark night; such am I standing outside this lady’s studied silence!
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Thanks Susan… Glad you liked that line…:)
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How very philosophical – if we cry in the rain does anybody see (including us) – Schrödinger’s cat came into my week – it reminded me of that! But your poem is far more lyrical..
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Thank you…that’s a neat analogy..in a way we are screaming and not screaming at the same time…
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Even at Diwali with all the light and revelry there may be sadness too and it is good that you have recognized that.
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Yes it’s easy to sense the forced gaiety sometimes…thanks for stopping by.
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Happy Diwali! May Mother Lakshmi bless you with love, light and prosperity, Thotpurge. A wonderful haibun of the Festival of Lights but just what is that truth that can wait until morning…?
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Thanks so much for your kind wishes. It is the truth hidden behind the dark curtains of night..who knows except her??!!!
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How right you are! :~)
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Some lovely descriptions in this. Beautiful.
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Thanks Bryan.
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That last line and closing haiku has pretty much summed up my week. It has hit that nail so hard it’s taking all I have for this Raivenne not to cry with the crow. The scene before beautifully colored especially in contrast to its ending.
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Thank you…hope things cheer up for you.
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Postpone till tomorrow the inevitable, enjoy the beauty of the night and the lights… There is a melancholy feel to this – but oh, the tears at dawn!
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Thank you Marina
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I love me some haibun, my favorite form these days. If a crow caws deep in the forest, & nobody hears it, is it a silent scream? The haiku is 5,5,7–interesting, slightly different form. I put tanka, haiku or American sentences or collom lunes in mine, & don’t keep every stanza in prose; what fun. Your piece certainly makes the reader want to know more about the woman.
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Thanks Glenn, I don’t stick to the syllable count ..just let the haiku breathe, even if the rules are broken a little bit 🙂
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In this I like your text part more than your haiku – more real, details and gorgeous…
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Thanks Abhra
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Beautiful and sad~ Wow, you pack a lot in-I love it~
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Thank you Ella
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A delightful if tragic read! Very good!
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Thanks so much.
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This such a wonderful image of sorrow and light at the same time.. The crow’s tears is the best part really.
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Thanks Bjorn…
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I love how this begins and flows, with some mystery as to her years; and the haiku is a nice match..
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Thanks so much…
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Even in the midst of light, there is darkness. Excellent haibun. Happy Diwali to you and hope your year is full of much light.
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Thanks Toni, glad you liked the haibun!
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For some reason this made me feel really sad despite the lights – it must have been that mournful crow crying.
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Think you read the emotion of the haibun very well Suzanne…thank you.
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Beautiful descriptions and such wonderful use of active verbs.
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Thank you Victoria 🙂
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Happy Diwali,,,and a beautiful poem
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Thank you very much 🙂
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xx
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What a colorful and beautiful celebration this is ~ You have weaved an intriguing character as well ~ I hope this is lovely beginning for her ~
Love the haibun ~
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Thanks Grace!
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Oh, wow. Gorgeous piece!
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Thank you 🙂
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love this haibun and the link of crow to blackness, tears, fire & water, and “wanting to burn a little hole in its opaque folds”
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Thanks Laura ..Diwali -the festival of light- was just celebrated here!!
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and here!
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And there too…lovely!!
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Thanks so much Laura!
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oof 🙂
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Oof yeah or oof what on earth?
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sometimes an oof is just an oof 🙂
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O-oh…that oof!!!!
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