Pause

somewhere leaves unhook green gowns
to bare mottled russet skin
here in your monochrome eyes
why is time fading

In Dodoitsu form which requires four lines with 7-7-7-5 syllables
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26 thoughts on “Pause

  1. Delicious. The first line reads and sounds wonderful–I love saying the words aloud, what speaking them does to my lips. The shot of colors and shapes you start with, only get stronger when you end with “monochrome”. Simply delicious.

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  2. I like that you chose to pair the idea from the first two lines with the last two. Gorgeous in your word choice, perhaps more so in the pairing. Viva la and thanks for sharing!

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