Gift Bag

in a sheer organza bag
with an embroidered half moon
the sound of the kneeling sea
repeating your name

In Dodoitsu form which requires four lines in a 7-7-7-5 syllable structure and no rhyme.
For Imaginary Gardens where the prompt is about spontaneous Tonal impressions. The painting is Moonrise, Beaumaris by Clarice Beckett.
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21 thoughts on “Gift Bag

  1. I really love this. The kneeling sea, in particular. You’ve managed to create a very complete tonal effect in so few words, each contributing to the visual image of that gauzy bag full of sea–really really well done. I also find the form very interesting and effective, so thanks for introducing me to it, and thanks for joining us with such a well-crafted offering.

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  2. I love the sound in a bag! I look at objects on my shelves and recall the moment and the person–as if the object called the name. It is a mood I enter, and I feel it here with the sea kneeling to honor the presence.

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